Episode 257

Published on:

29th May 2023

Everton's Great Escape & Leicester's Fall: Premier League Season Triumphs and Tragedies

Discover the secrets behind Everton's Premier League survival in an unforgettable season that had us all on the edge of our seats! Be part of our conversation as we dissect the highs and lows, and discuss how the club managed to stay afloat despite constant mismanagement, ownership shuffles, and the impact of the Benitez era and Lampard's palace coup. Thank you for joining us on this thrilling journey!

Prepare to shed a tear for Leicester City as we examine their shocking decline from league winners in 2013/2014 to relegation this season. We'll delve into the frailties of their defense, highlighting Danny Ward's struggles as a goalkeeper and the team's inability to remember past relegation battles. Don't miss our analysis on the team's lack of survival instinct and the disarray in the boardroom that contributed to their downfall.

Get ready to relive the magic of the Premier League season as we reminisce about unforgettable moments such as Manchester United's triumph over Fulham, Kenny Tete's masterpiece goal, Chelsea's stalemate with Newcastle, and Nottingham Forest's draw with Iwani from Gibbs-White. Applaud the goal-scoring legends like Erling Haaland, Harry Kane, Callum Wilson, and Ollie Watkins, and marvel at the playmaking genius of Kevin De Bruyne and Riyad Mahrez. We'll wrap up by revealing our best 11 of the season in a classic 4-4-2 formation, paying tribute to the exceptional players who made this season one for the history books!


0:00:00 - Everton's Survival and Consistency

0:01:46 - Everton's Fight for Survival

0:08:25 - The Sad Reality of Relegation

0:09:07 - End of Season Relegation Battle

0:17:48 - Brentford's Victory Against Manchester City

0:23:53 - Premier League Season Recap and Superlatives

0:29:28 - Premier League Season Results

0:32:37 - Kane and Haaland's Impressive Goal Scoring

0:35:48 - Luton Town's Shootout Victory

0:41:29 - Bundesliga and European Football Issues


#PremierLeague #Everton #LeicesterCity #Relegation #Survival #Mismanagement #Ownership #BenitezEra #Lampard #ManchesterUnited #Fulham #Chelsea #Newcastle #NottinghamForest #GibbsWhite #ErlingHaaland #HarryKane #CallumWilson #OllieWatkins #KevinDeBruyne #RiyadMahrez #Alisson #KieranTrippier #RubenDiaz #SvenBotman #Grealish #Soccer #BrunoFernandez #Cain #Raya #Pinnock #FabianSchar #LewisDunk #MoSalah #Bruno


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Hello and welcome to the squeaky bum time podcast with an exclusively on the CHOP Sports channel of the premier streaming network. We are recording this for the second time on Monday, may 29th. I am your host, laurent Cortines, in this episode. The Premier League season ends, we know who's going to be relegated and we know who's going to be in Europe, and we're gonna go through all of it. But first, thank you everybody for being a part of this show and listening, and it wouldn't be worth it without the dozens and hundreds of you who listen to the show. So thank you so much for going on this journey.

38 weeks, a World Cup, european Cups, uefa Champions League, championship Games We've talked through all of it. We talked about a Scudetto for Angela. We've talked about Liverpool falling apart. We've made fun of Manchester United. We've lamented cities slow season. We've lauded Arsenal. We've declared them chokers, we declared them winners. We've put five teams down and five teams up. We thought Bournemouth would go, we thought Nottingham Forest would go. We thought all these things would happen, but in the end, after 38 match weeks, we finally have it all, and we have it all from you. I do it for everybody who listens to the show. I do it for Dave Sturcio and the whole gang over at the CHOP Sports Channels and our time over on the Premier Streaming Network. So it's amazing to do a whole season again with everyone and hopefully we enjoy it. Okay, so let us get to it.

Everton survive. They had the right game. They had everything in hand. They were at home versus Bournemouth, lester were at home versus West Ham and Leeds were at home versus Tottenham. Leeds needed the most things to happen. They needed both Lester and Everton to lose and they needed to win. Lester needed Everton to lose and they needed to win and Everton just needed to win. And it looked like Everton wasn't in trouble. Lester did get the first goal. Sorry, leeds gave up the first goal of the day and the second goal of the day and they were really down from the beginning. Harry Kane getting 30 goals. Leeds is always the perfect antidote for any team needing to score goals and Lester getting their goals and getting their win versus West Ham first, from Barnes and Madison just linking up and doing the thing they've been doing all season. But it was Everton. It was Everton with the fight, it was Everton with the effort, it was Everton who rode their crowd and Goodison Park in the face of just a life or death situation for that club.

Decoré, on the free kick by McNeil, after Mina was fouled in the box I mean outside the box It comes off a reflected shot and Decoré just leathers it as hard as you can hit it, as pure as you can hit it, and gets the goal that Everton needs. It's on 57. They really don't look like they're ever going to score. Damari Gray has a header in front of goal. Before that, there's just opportunities. Garner takes an amazing shot that hits. That just tips over. He was probably the best player on the day.

The wing back for them. We saw Connor Cody come in. I was wondering where he was all season. I didn't understand why Deich wouldn't play him. But Mina Tarkovsky, cody, just a strong back four. We saw Onana, we saw Ewobe, we saw Decoré. That group along with McNeil and Damari Gray. They just did what they needed to do and fought and gave effort. It was all Goodison Park ever wanted. It was all they needed and they can breathe a sigh of relief that they remain and retain their Premier League status.

There was a little bit of a rushing of the field at the end. There was a little bit of a sack the board, which is what we really should talk about more than anything. We'll start with Everton. What this means for them. This means the survival I know it's not literal survival, but it's Everton were a club that were a poster boy for mismanagement, a disconnected board with Mishiri and Bill Kenwright And I can't remember.

Osmanoff, i believe, is an investor. Osmanoff gets pulled out because of the Putin connections. So that's one group of money. They've been spending money like crazy. They've been disjointed about what they wanted to do. They went to Ancelotti, they went to Kuman, they went here. They spent for this manager. Then they had Sam Allardyce. They went for that manager, roberto Martinez, all these different ownership groups that are pulling the club from side to side One manager's players, another manager's players, guilty cigarettes and raping teenagers, that guy just disappearing. It's just one of these clubs that just didn't really have a rhyme or reason. They thought they could spend their way up and they had this plan and they're going to have their stadium, but in the middle of that They forgot.

The most important thing is the consistency of manager. Consistency from top to middle, to bottom, to academy. So from the boardroom to the directors of football, to the coach. You had the Benitez era before Lampard. He was disconnected from the fans. He committed a palace coup, removing that middle layer so that he could talk directly to the board, and then they sacked him after he sold their best fullback in Dina, who is an attacking player. So it was always all over the place. You had enchilotti in between that How was he even there? And then you had gotten up with Jamez Ramirez in the team. So all these things add together and it was just a chaotic mix that Lampard rode his luck, got the fans on side, there was enough talent with Calvert, lewin and decor to get them through. And then Daesh, they fired him with just enough time And I mean just enough time and they got by with the skin of their teeth. Connor Cody put it best. He was like it's relief and all singing from the same hymn book. This cannot happen again. This club has got to get itself back together.

have not been relegated since:

I think Sunderland is a good example of a big club, a local club with good history, that if they went down it would be the end. They might not. It's a bear pit in the championship. You're not guaranteed to come back up. You can go. It happens, it happens. Leeds spent 16 years in the wilderness, nottingham Forest spent 26 years in the wilderness of the championship, up and down. Once you go down, i don't want to know what's going on underneath there. And so Everton pulled himself out of it and they have a chance to go again and set it right. But they've got to do it. They've got to clear people out of the board, get alignment top to bottom and let Dijs do his job. Maybe a season of Dijs before you start thinking about attacking football again. Dijs is about as David Moyes in a younger mold as you can get where it's a safe pair of hands. You're not going down, even though Burnley did. It was an anomaly. They shouldn't have gone down. They spent seven years in the league And I would say that the players at Everton are far, far better than anything that Dijs ever had at Everton, even though some of them are from Everton Heroes Tarkovsky, mina, pickford, the aforementioned Garner and Decore just up and down, never say die, never gave up. What an incredible performance. It wasn't good football. Whatever it was, it was a not check performance for them And I'm happy they're there.

ball world and won the league:

The first weakness was the goalkeeper. Danny Ward was never a replacement for Schmichael And he gave the creakiness, although the season before they had been very creaky on set pieces. When they finished 8th, disappointingly, they really took another step back And so they had to score a goal. And so they scored 10 goals which we assumed would dry up, really dried up. They lost about 10 goals from him 12 goals, and you can see it in their goal number. You know they, they gave, they scored 10 less goals, and that's literally Jamie Vardy, madison and Barnes were great all season, telemans not so much, and this team just sort of drifted into the relegation zone and never really understood what it meant to get out of it All the experience and know how of being in a relegation battle from this team's DNA that actually won them. The league was gone. There was no Morgan, there was no hooth, there was no institutional memory of relegation battle which this team had. It had come up and brought itself up and finished in 14th at first season, then wins the league on a 40 point jump the year, the next year, the year after, under run year, and so institutionally they didn't quite understand what was happening to them. They bring in Dean Smith late and nothing really changes. They don't find the win they need. They did get nine wins.

This Lester team, as I said, i was certain that nine wins would be the number that took them up, but they could never get there. They could never find the right, they could never find the right mixes to get this team in the right frame of mind to say, yes, we're in a relegation battle. It started from the start of the season where they shipped goals five to brighten, then six to Tottenham. We're just giving up goals like crazy early in the season with with, with Danny Ward, where we'd like, oh my God, they're gonna die. Then they write the ship in between the October and the World Cup They get into decent shape but then come back from the World Cup and they're right back to shipping goals, even though they do have a little stretch there with winning against Villa and Tottenham, but then they go on a tailspin again. That's when Rogers loses his job And it seems like there's no way out. Dean Smith comes in a little bit too late.

The draw against Newcastle was heroic but lucky, and they set up this opportunity to just be able to have a shot. I think it left for them in the 2-2 draw against Everton. They win that one. There's a penalty to Madison that he misses. The 5-3 against Fulham was just another sort of disaster class. And then 1-1 against Leeds. You've got to beat the people around you and they just aren't able to do that. There's also a 1-0 loss. There's two 1-0 losses, one against Southampton and one against Bournemouth, that are just unacceptable. And so Lester says goodbye to the Premier League And it's sad because these are big clubs and the championship is going to be a real barefoot, and we'll get to that when we get to the champions portion of the season.

For Leeds, they needed a lot to go right and they never even showed up to even fight for this relegation battle, if you'd sense a common theme. This team was also disjointed at the board level, going from the Elsa to Marsh to Gracia, and they did not really have a cohesive plan where they allow Marsh to handle and buy players during the January window when really this team philosophically they needed to shore up and get defensive And they never really changed out their defensive backline. It was still the same championship level defense they had. They were still relying on Luke Eiling and players who'd brought them up. They were so terrible They finally cut bait on Mellier who had been terrible all season.

I'd been talking about how poor they were in the goalkeeping department all season And you know, if I look at their defensive unit, it's Liam Cooper. You know it's still ailing. They're playing new guys Weber, pascal Struck just shows up ailing. They're moving defenders into the midfield to try and get different levels of solidity. Robin Calk is in the midfield. So for Shaw, they're just playing as many defensive minded players as possible And they just were never defensive.

All you have to do is look at the bench Purple, aronson, roca, somerville, ruter, nyonto, that's what they thought they were going to win with And they just and that was Marcia's design And they just couldn't get it done with him. We can play false narratives, or you know what the narrative fallacies if, if Marcia had stayed, if Marcia had stayed, would they have gotten more wins? Maybe, but the manners of the defeats that that leads were suffering, where they were just shipping goals, were terrible. Yes, they would score. Yes, they would have second halves where they would keep attacking and keep going and keep going, which made their goal difference and underlying numbers look better than they were. But then even under under Allardyce, it still didn't work And they were shipping goals and then they were not scoring anymore.

I'm sure Patrick Banford is going to lose lots and lots of sleep for missed shots, missed penalties. That probably would have at least given leads a shot to have a better chance on a final day. So leads, after 16 years in a wilderness, gets to spend three seasons in the Premier League. Now their watch is over And they do have to go down, down, down into the championship where, you know, maybe they'll bring Bielsa back, but I believe he took the Chile job. So that is the relegation battle. Congrats to Everton, congrats to Roger Bennett of the Men in Blazers, whose staging of him yelling at television screens is getting a little tired. But you know they have taken a step forward in the Men in Blazers brand. It's a lot bigger than it was doing a lot of social stuff. So good for them.

But we do have other games to go to and I'm going to just go right to the schedule and just go through them. Just in terms of what happened, brentford, the mighty bees of Brentford, do take it to Manchester City. They win one nil and do the double on a game that only had one XG total. City played, called Palmer. We had Rico Lewis in defense. You know not quite our championship team there. You know Calvin Phillips played. It was a good side but not a connected side. Mara has got some burn, along with Sergio Gomez playing up front, which was a little bit odd. So on the wing, in the Grealish spot, a great season for Brentford Pinnock, with the goal, of course, on a set piece. How else would Brentford score? They did really work at making lots of changes down the stretch to get this game done. But they do the double against City and have a really great 59 point hall where they sit in ninth.

Villa defeat Brighton to go to Europe. We saw the best of Brighton. We saw the best of Aston Villa and I do want to give a lot of time for Villa. They were proud to go to Europe. Unlike Spurs, they're happy to be there. Brighton are very happy to be there. We've got two teams that want to be in Europe and have ambition and aren't jaded by the process of Thursday, sunday. Isn't that the fucking point?

And then the other thing that I think about with Aston Villa is how underrated this group is. It's a team that's very solid, the pieces all go together and no one is talking about taking their players. Jacob Ramsey, with another goal, fantastic. Ali Watkins Why isn't he in the transfer requests? Why don't people want John McGinn? Why isn't he slated for Liverpool? What about Douglas Luis? Doesn't he want to go to Liverpool?

All these players that people are saying, oh, should go to other teams. Tyrone Mingz, a left-footed fullback Are you kidding me? Those are the best players ever. We keep talking about players leaving Brighton. We talk about Estupian, pascua Gross and all these players. Mcallister, buenanotte, undav and all these players that could move from Brighton. But how come no one's looking at players from Villa? They're only one game behind them. But we don't give Unai Emery the same thing, because it's a more negative style, but they're right next to each other.

Aston Villa on 61 with Brighton on 62. But no one's talking about Aston Villa as the greatest team that was ever created. Unai Emery, respect, respect, respect. Unai Emery. Guy fucking won with PSG, Won four Europa Leagues. He's fucking legit. So that's Aston Villa, west Brom, i mean Brighton. Brighton again Just loved the Deserby Bowl. We talked Lester, west Ham, we talked Everton, bournemouth, southampton four, liverpool, four. What A four-four Liverpool really showing they're not quite ready to be their normal self.

The best part is the heartfelt Bobby Firmino goal. That was such a Bobby Firmino goal, calmadine, Sulamano, with two goals of outstanding quality to pull this game nearly level, to actually pull the game level and actually go ahead. Three, two at halftime. But the powerful Liverpool attack pulls two goals back on 72 and 73 to win this game 4-4. We saw everything that was the problem with Liverpool this season. They can score, they can go forward, they've got nice stuff, but they also can ship goals. To be fair, it is Matip and Joe Gomez at the back and it was Callaher and not Allison, so, but we did see our friend Mr Trent Alexander Arnold sort of getting trouble at the back what Liverpool do solidify their Europa League.

e since they won the title in:

Manchester United and their warm-up game beat the mighty powerful Fulham to one. Sancho getting warm as we get closer to the season and Bruno Fernandez scoring the most hated man in the league, but God damn it, he's good And underrated. Kenny Tete gets a goal. This game probably could have drawn, but our friend Mr Mitrovich misses his fourth penalty kick of the season. I don't know how you miss four penalty kicks in a year, but I guess if you score 40 goals in the championship and you get an eight game suspension for bumping a ref, you take the fucking penalties. So good for him.

Chelsea season ends the way it started, with a whimper 1-1 to Newcastle. I think Newcastle will be disappointed that they drew this game. A 14th draw for Newcastle. They're going to have to clean that up and find ways to win games next season if they want to challenge their solidified into the Champions League. Finish a season and fourth behind United and we'll go through the table right after we finish. The scores And then a game that Nottingham Forest fans will be so happy Didn't mean anything.

The 1-1 draw with Nottingham Forest Iwani from Gibbs White, just showing one last time what got them up. If they can hold on to those two players, they'll stay in the league. It's not a very simple game. Defend your goal and have guys who could score. Not that hard, it's not that hard. You can stay up forever If you've got a decent goal scorer, someone to get them to goal the ball, and you don't give up goals. I know it sounds crazy, but that's the game, right. Don't give them up and score them when you got them. So that is the final week of the season. Wowie, wow. But let us go through the final table. I know you can just look it up, but I'll do some final commentary on each one.

City on 89, win the league 61 goal difference, right in line where they were, where you'd expect them. Arsenal amazing season on 84,. United, 9 points behind that on 75. A good season for them. That Mourinho 81 point season, when this in 17, 16, 17 looks more and more like a genius season. Newcastle on 71, finishing fourth. Liverpool on 67, a 25 point drop from the season before. That just gives you a sense of how far they were on 93 last season, or 91 last season, on 67 this season. That's how much they needed a midfielder 30 points worth. Liverpool in fifth, brighton on 62, five points behind them Set the record. They just placed their lockdown for Europa.

In seventh, aston Villa, tottenham and Brentford. Then we have, from Tottenham down, we have this run of mid table London teams Tottenham in eighth, brentford in ninth, fulham in tenth, crystal Palace in eleventh, london holding up the middle of the table, oh, along with Chelsea in 12th. That's four, five London teams in a row. So London holding up the mid table with Chelsea in 12th, their worst finish ever in the Premier League. Wolves in 13th represented the Midlands. West Ham, bournemouth in 15th, forest in 16th, everton in 17th, leicester Leeds at Southampton are down. Wow, that was the season.

Another little anecdote for the first time ever, the top half of the division all on a positive goal difference, the bottom half of the division all on minus. I look at that number. It sort of gives you an indicative of like. If you have a plus goal difference, you usually finish in the top half, or you, or if you're not in line with where you should be. It usually is indicative of something to look at. So that's how I get my nerd fix. I kind of look at your goal difference. And then I start trying to look under the hood and be like, hey, wait a minute, why is Manchester United only have a 15 goal difference? And then everyone around them is plus 35 and above. Hmm, united, maybe you got lucky. So there's that there that I like to look at. And they look at Brighton and their plus 19,. Not bad for them.

Okay, let us go to the superlatives of the season. Your top goal scoring players, the golden boot winner, was the great and powerful Erling Holland on 36,. Kane on 30,. Tony on 20 suspended won't be back till January. Most solid 19,. Callum Wilson fire down the stretch on 18,. Marcus restaurant 17,. Oda guard on 15,. Martin Ellie on 15,. Ollie Watkins sneaky 15 goals with soccer on 14, making up your top 10 goalscores. Just to give you a sense, to finish in the top five you only need 18 goals. It's hard to score goals. Your assist man, you're passing boot. Kevin De Bruyne with 16,. Sala with 12. So Sala with 16 and 19. I mean 19 and 12,. A very, very, very good season on the goal and sharing side of things, along with Picari soccer who was going to have 14 and 11. Michael Alise, the smoothest motherfucker in the world for Crystal Palace on 11 assists, with Riyadh Maurer is barely playing but still has 10 assists. So those are those guys. Let us go to my best 11 for the season. I'm going to do a 4-4-2. I'm going to make it fast. Okay, here we go.

In goalkeeper, i have the great and powerful Allison. He's too good. Allison is the best goalkeeper in the league. He saved fucking Liverpool so many. God. That times It's just unreal. In defense, kieran Trippier is the right back of the year. He was incredible. Sorry, trent, you came on too late. You were not the best player consistently from week to week and you did not hold up your end. On the defensive side, kieran Trippier, in the top three of shots created. What an incredible player.

In central defense, i've got to have Ruben Diaz along, because he is the winning formula that gets city moving. It's without his leadership, without his defensive steel, without everything that he brings to the team, city don't function. And his record shows that he was like 23 and one when, when he played once, he came back into the side. That's when city took off. That's when Johnstone stepped in the midfield because they could trust that they had a central defender who could carry them forward. Then I have Sven Botman. The Newcastle defense is what made them work. So Botman's in there. He let Shah and Trippier do the things they need to do because he controlled the rest of the defensive assignment.

So between Diaz and Botman, i'm I'm rewarding defensive defenders, and then my left fullback has to be a stupid young. What a goddamn player. He is the best. Just screw you, mr Robinson. You're no longer the best defender as stupid young for Brighton. One guy's got to get in this team and that's the man who's going to get it. Sorry, kaisado, you're not going to make it into the midfield of this team because it's going to be across the four on the wings.

Grealish and soccer. Grealish just made city work. He's pausing his working back in defense just became city's best player in the second half of the season, where he could just control games by attacking, slowing things down, moving things forward, getting the balls to Holland. And then soccer was the engine that made arsenal work. Between he and Oda guard There was almost 30 goals and at least 20 assists. Just an incredible group.

But in the midfield it's the bro and Bruno Fernandez. Bruno Fernandez just makes United work. Once he got out of the shadow of Cristiano, he could do his thing again. He stopped deferring, he stopped being afraid of the legend and he was able to be the Fernandez, the Bruno that he was when he first came to United and put them on his back. This guy's a 15 and 15 guy. I mean, he wasn't this season, but he can be. No one had more assists missed. His ex-assist was over the room, over the, over the moon, and he just missed out on so many little goals. He is a legend. If he would just stop rolling around on a ground I could love him a little bit more. And then, upfront, it's Cain and Holland. Holland, we've gone through a million times, but with with Cain, i do want to put another minute minute in.

The guy scored 30 goals on that continent team. That is a feat beyond recognition. He led the league in percentage of goals scored for his team 30 goals on a team that only scored 70. That's 43% of their goals. No one's even close in the top 10 of goals. Holland, with 36, only represented 38% of his the team's goals, because cities did score more and had more opportunities, but just an amazing amount of goals for a team That poor. I think it's the context like Spurs were brutal and to score 30 goals on that Tottenham team that finished eighth.

We're going to look back and go. How did he do that? Harry Kane then becomes only the second player ever to have two 30 goal seasons in the Premier League. You'd have thought it was on read. It was not. He and Shearer now are the stand alone as players who have 30 goals in a season. You know why that happens Usually, if you score 30, you leave and go to a better team where they don't need you that much. So Harry Kane, just an incredible, incredible, incredible player that we all love and respect.

You just want him to go play for United. Just do it. Just do it, harry. Just go to United. Just be at pain in the ass. Say you're going to hold out and not play. If you don't go, that's what you have to do. Be a dick. Really do it this time, though. Don't half-ass it. Be like I'm not going on the tour, i'm not going on this, i'm not doing it. Hold out until you get your move, okay. What else is there to talk about? Golden Gloves? We know Dehea won it, even though he was not the best keeper. He doesn't come for crosses and he does save a lot of goals, but I think United would probably want a new goalkeeper, and they should want a new goalkeeper.

Honorable mentions on teams of the season. I just have to go back. I do want to shout out Raya, who was fantastic in defense. Pinnock, for Brighton, was fantastic. Fabian Schar was fantastic. I love Tarkovsky. Lewis Dunk needs a shout in the midfield, of course. Oda Guard, of course, was fantastic. Kaisato was fantastic.

Mo Salah not making this team is criminal, but there's only so many spots. We love them all. There's so many great players in the Premier League and we're blessed to have them all in there. Just shout out to Bruno Gimmerich, who was also fantastic. Rodri, rodri, rodri, you make City go to. Not have you in this team is ridiculous. Yes, it's all offensive midfielders, but that's just the nature of how football works. That's my four, that was my 11, but those are my shots. I do need to go on to. We talked about relegation. We talked about who was leaving the league, who is arriving. Luton Town win in a shootout. A good game and enjoyable game.

Luton Town just first half, really first half an hour really battered Coventry City with their force and energy and size and they just seem to get to every second ball. They get the goal early from Jordan Clark who bundles it in, who fires it in on a cutback. Really good looking goal. But then Coventry grew into the game. They changed, they got their talisman player Gorka's up near the player they needed it to be. Where's the guy's name Near Hamar, gustavo Hamar, who scored a goal on 66. So it was one one. We went to penalties and sadly, on the six penalty, van Cati Dabo fires it over the bar. He didn't look like he wanted to take a penalty, but every penalty was fantastic.

Luton Town taking 10 years to go from the conference league out of the EFL to the Premier League is a miracle. It is what Reksem is trying to do. It would be if, from the moment you come up in 10 years, if in 10 years Reksem is in the Premier League, they will have matched what Lutentown did, along with Wimbledon and the derp. Whatever, wimbledon is the crazy gang Wimbledon team. In Robbie Earl's mid-80s, early 90s, wimbledon did the same thing.

Coventry City, valiant, skyblue we love them, we love the specials, we love SCA. But sadly, coventry, you have to go back and try and go again. Take the pain, lift it up and make yourself grow again. They've been on the up and up. I like where Coventry is? They just got to find more players and lift themselves up. Thankfully, tom Lockyer, who collapsed during the game, is fine.

That was a scary moment. It was very reminiscent of your kind of It wasn't quite like Reksem, but he did just collapse without anyone touching him. He just hit the ground, just like I had a heart palpitation. So was it the COVID vaccine? Was it COVID? I don't know. Anyway, it doesn't matter.

Luton the Hatters and their goofy fucking logo are in the Premier League and we are happy to have them. You're going to hear about Kenilworth Low Road and the stadium. It's been done ad nauseam. Still, i'll say it one more time Check out how you enter from the away and you literally go through people's backyards. So that's a needed thing to say. But we're going to have great stories.

I do want to go into the League One playoffs as well, because there we have Sheffield Wednesday versus Barnsley Wednesday getting the goal late with in extra time of added time. So sorry, in extra time, in added time, in the 120th minute, sheffield gets the win and Barnsley in the South Yorkshire Derby. Sheffield Wednesday will be in the championship Applying their trade. The championship is just going to be a fucking bloodbath next year with all the teams that are in there. And lastly, we have Carlisle going through on penalties versus Stockport. Stockport trying to do the double promotion just a bridge too far. Miss one penalty in the second round and they have to go and stay in League Two one more season. But Stockport were fantastic. Russ and the boys at Fanhub, i'm sorry had to go through that sucks, but Stockport County will have another chance again. So that's your English pyramid, that is your conference pyramid. We know about Knox County and Wrexham going up. I can't really discuss who went down in the championship, but remember, when someone's going up, someone's going down. So just keep that in mind when we think about pro-REL for the USA and what it means and how great it is. It does mean someone's life is fucking ending and the moon door has grabbed them and sent them down to the nether regions of football. Just keep that in mind. As much as you cheer, feel the pain for others.

Lastly, i don't normally do Bundesliga, but I do want to talk a little bit about Barusa Dortmund bodily against Bayern Munich. Bayern Munich were having their worst season ever on 71 points. They were the worst points per game champion this season on 2.08 points per game. They were only on 71. Yes, it's a 34 game season, so I understand that part, but they were so, so bad. And Dortmund had a chance. All they had to do was win at home. They had only dropped points twice all season. They had dropped only four points all year at home. Mainz was on the beach. They give up two goals in the first 10 minutes. They fucking panicked, they bottled it, they choked. They had 80,000 fans in the Vestvallien stadium and they yacked it, and so Bayern Munich and that broken fucking Bundesliga will have Bayern Munich win their 11th title in a row.

I want to talk about a system that's not working. You keep telling me about this 50 plus one community owned club. Shit, it shit doesn't work. You need competition, you need investment, you need people frayed And in the Bundesliga, whatever that system is they have put together, it's not working for competition. You can't have Bayern winning your league every year and tell me it's a good league. I'm sorry, bundesliga, stop. Also, stop selling players to Bayern. Just, everyone should collude and be like no, we're not doing it, done. So that's the Bundesliga Most of the leagues are have their season ending next week.

So Barcelona is already won, napoli, we know, is already won, psg one just now. Cities already won. We've got it all squared away. We do have an FA Cup next week, a Manchester derby. We do have Manchester City in the Champions League final while I'm in New York at Hooligan Day. So a massive, massive, massive weekend of football coming up And then, after that Champions League final, i will record my final episode for at least, at least a few weeks. I need a break, i need to recharge, i need to get myself back to neutral so I can enjoy this thing all over again. Anyway, thank you, everybody's been great. That was the squeaky bum time podcast with Laurent Cortines. We are the football wing of the Chop Sports Channel, presented exclusively by the Premier Streaming Network. We record on Mondays and Thursdays, so be sure to subscribe wherever you get your show. And thank you so much. Please like, share and subscribe to the show. It means everything. Thank you, thank you, thank you, Enjoy.

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About the Podcast

Squeaky Bum Time: An English Premier League Podcast
We cover news from the Premier League, The FA Cup, Carabao Cup and the UEFA Champions League... as long as there are English clubs playing!
Laurent Courtines is your host. He loves football and talks nonsense about things that make most people uncomfortable.

And sometimes Premier League football.

We focus on English football, talk about the clubs in the top flight, the relegation battle and how our beloved club Manchester City is doing across all competitions domestically and abroad.
Specifically, the Premier League, The FA Cup, Carabao Cup, UEFA Champions League, UEFA Europa League.
During internationals, we'll talk CONCACAF, UEFA, The United States National team, Mexico, Canada and the FIFA World Cup along with the European Championship.

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About your host

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Laurent Courtines

Laurent Courtines is the host of the Squeaky Bum Time Podcast podcast, a show dedicated to amateur football punditry with a severe bias towards Manchester City. Despite never having played the game himself, Laurent brings a unique perspective as a middle-aged American who has never watched some teams play. He covers Manchester City news, match reactions, analysis, fan talk, previews, and transfer reviews and reactions on the show. With over a century of experience, Laurent and CFCP Productions have been providing expert (or at least, enthusiastic) football commentary since 1894.